Oh God I’m so hungry. I haven’t hunted in weeks! I don’t know how Alice and the others can stand it, I feel as if my throat is on fire.
“Jasper?” Asks Alice, her hand pressing onto my arm. “Are you okay?”
“Fine” I lie, flashing a small, fake smile towards her. She nods, concerned. Of course she can see through me. Her eyes meet Edward’s for the smallest of moments. He knows what I’m thinking, what I’m feeling. I sigh and try to immerse myself in something else. Pointless really as I don’t need to eat or breathe. The cafeteria is packed. All around me I can smell them, hear the blood pulsing through their veins… My throat burns and, if not for Edward’s hand on my shoulder, I might have got up and killed the girl at the next table who’s dark brown hair and pale skin look so appealing. Alice looks into my eyes.
“Jaz do you want to leave?” She asks me softly. I shake my head, mouth clamped shut. I really do, more than anything but I can see Emmett’s grin beginning to grow. I swallow dryly. I refuse to be weak. I’ve killed humans, I’ve killed vampires. Surely I can stop myself from killing. Alice twines her fingers around mine and I relax a little, calming myself. Edward is looking away from us, at the pale girl. He looks uninterested. I’m glad I don’t have to hear everyone else’s thoughts; it must get annoying.   
“I’m leaving” Alice declares suddenly, her eyes fixed no me. She gets up and motions for me to follow her. I do, gratefully, punching Emmett on the shoulder as I leave. The pale dark haired girl’s eyes follow Alice as well. I suppose it’s strange for them to see somebody as beautiful as Alice. She must be a little jealous. Her gaze flicks back to Edward, it’s always the same, some new girl arrives and they look at us, at Edward, thinking they stand a chance with him. “Jasper I’m sorry” Says Alice the moment we’re clear of the cafeteria. “I had no idea it was that painful for you. Edward should have told me…” She looks at me. “Is it really that bad?” She whispers.
“What did you see?” I ask
“You were… you were going to kill that girl… the new girl. I saw you walking over and…”
“I’m sorry Al,” I said. “I’m so weak! I can’t control hunger like you can. It’s so hard for me…” Alice wraps her thin arms around me and kisses me softly on the cheek.
“You need to hunt Jasper. You’re starving.” I laugh weakly.
“You can say that again”
“Come on” She says, and takes my hand. We start to run, speeding up as we head into the forest. I feel better with deer’s blood running down my chin, at least the burning pain in my throat has subsided a little but the blood of animals just doesn’t compare to human… Alice catches my eye, somehow she always know what I’m thinking. I sigh and turn to her.
“Alice… I’m sorry… I just want it so much!” Alice hugs me tightly. I lift her face towards me and kiss her softly. She smiles and we head back towards school, with any luck we can make it in time for afternoon class. Alice throws Mr. Vander a glowing smile as we enter ten minutes late
“I’m so sorry sir,” She says, her voice like velvet. The teacher looks at her and brushes his hair back, blushing a little
“No problem miss Cullen,” He says. Alice takes my hand as we sit down beside each other. Being a vampire sure has its advantages.
The lesson drags, normally I can shut it out, the rubbish about trigonometry and ratios, stuff I’ve known for years and have to repeat again and again, but today the burning sensation in my throat is still there, even after I’ve hunted, I can’t seem to get away from it. Emmett’s stupid grin floats into my mind, I block the image out. I hate having him laugh at me. It isn’t my fault I can’t control my hunger like the others can. I’m whining to myself now, its stupid. The rest of the day goes so slowly I almost decide to leave once or twice, sitting at home doing nothing, or even hunting again would be preferable to struggling with my hunger. Alice is having visions again, every now and then she sits up rigidly in her seat and her dark eyes glaze over. She grabs my hand roughly, her nails digging into my skin. I know what she’s seeing; it doesn’t take a genius to work that out. When she comes out of her own little world she turns to me, she looks shocked.
“Jasper? I think you should leave.” She says, her voice is low and urgent
“Why? Al, I’ve got it under control” I lie
“No you haven’t, I just had probably the strongest vision I’ve ever had. You are going to kill someone if you stay here!” She tightened her grip on my wrist and led me out. I didn’t protest this time when Emmett and Edward weren’t there, and Rosalie with her stupid smug smile. Alice knew me better than anybody, better even than I knew myself. I trusted her with- well not my life, but what remained of it, the tattered shreds of humanity I still clung to- they were hers. I fell into a kind of stupor as we walked, remembering the moment I met Alice. She knew, of course that I loved her, and she loved me, but I had never known anything like love before. I felt human again as I locked my eyes with hers. I almost felt my heart beat again. Alice whispers something to me that I dodn’t hear and dropped my hand. I watched her run away from me, dashing past the cafeteria and towards the science block. I called her name and ran after her.
“Alice?” I asked when I caught up with her “what’s wr…” I saw her face and gasped. Tears were streaming from her wide dark eyes; she looked like a young girl, weak and scared. I gathered her in my arms and stroked her hair until she stopped weeping, long enough for her to choke out the words
“Edward… he’s… I saw it, the girl from the cafeteria, Bella Swan…he…he…” She broke down again into uncontrollable sobs
“What did he do Alice? What did you see?”
“It was like I was standing next to him… he killed them all! The whole class and then he… he… her blood smells so…”
“So what?” I whispered
“good… so good” She looked up at me, her eyes like huge orbs of fear
We have to stop him Jasper”
I nodded, deep inside me I felt a leap of fear. What has he done? I thought. I’m supposed to be the weak one, who can’t control my hunger and is bound to kill somebody. Edward just isn’t like that, he wouldn’t dishonour Carlisle like that.
Alice and I were nearing the science block now and she skidded to a halt ahead of me. She turned back
“Jaz I can smell her! I can smell that blood! Stop, don’t come any closer or you’ll go insane” I stepped back, trembling. Alice’s eyes were black as coal. I reached out towards her but the shook her head
“Stay there, I’ll stop him” And she walked through the double doors leading to the biology rooms.
                    I waited for what seemed like forever but I knew Alice was right, if this girl’s blood was as amazing as she had said I wouldn’t be able to control myself. I would strike, bite, kill… shut up jasper I told myself firmly don’t think about it you moron. Finally I saw Alice and Edward coming out of the double doors.
“Edward?” I asked, “What was this all about? What happened?” I shouted as they got nearer. Alice’s face was twisted into a dark mask of anger and Edward was holding her upper arm in a vice-like grip. I walked over and pulled his hand off her arm
“Edward?” I asked again, quietly
“I- I didn’t mean to! I didn’t want to feel like that Jasper! I know now what you’re dealing with I was going to kill her I could hardly control it! Her blood smelt like… I can’t even describe it; it just hit me when she walked in. Carlisle’ll probably know already” He said glumly “I’ve disappointed him haven’t I? All these years I’ve lived like this, living off animal’s blood but she…” He tailed off
“You have to swap classes Edward. You can’t stay near…” Alice stopped speaking as well and turned to look at something… someone. Edward tensed his muscles and stepped forward, his eyes glowing. I looked about me to see what they were seeing and saw nothing except the pale skinned new girl, Bella Swan. How could this fragile human have driven my brother into such a frenzy, there was nothing special about her, I couldn’t even smell anything except the constant scent of human blood, nothing that really struck me as different, or better than usual. I was holding tightly to Edward’s wrist when I smelt it
The blood
The sweetest, most sensual, blissful smell I had ever sensed in my entire existence
It wasn’t as if I liked it, I hated it with a fiery passion and hatred that I could control even less than my sudden ravaging hunger. I couldn’t even see Alice as she grabbed hold of me and started whispering calming words to me, my emotions seemed to stretch and split with tension. All the shackles of my former life with Carlisle fell from me as I watched the human walk past, she didn’t glance at us but I felt as if her eyes were piecing straight through my skin, through my defences, burning a blazing trail through my senses, tearing a bloody path in my soul, or what I have left of it. Alice held me tightly as I writhed in pain and terror. The girl was a monster! A pale skinned demon!
“Jasper!” Alice shouted and for the first time in what seemed like years I heard her musical voice cutting through my madness “Jasper she’s gone!” I relaxed this can’t have been what Edward felt can it? I thought as Alice helped me to her car in the parking lot, Edward was unusually quite on the way home. His eyes were black. He must have endured more than me, having just hunted that morning. We sped along the narrow road in silence. I knew, deep down, that something had changed, and it wasn’t me. Edward caught my eyes for a fleeting moment and I understood what he felt. My brother was falling in love with somebody he wanted to kill.